The Mask Pride Supplied

I left with grace—you’d think that might suffice,

After the years I bled to make you shine;

But warmth can rot beneath a coat of ice,

And yours was gone the moment I resumed.

The praise you sang turned silence overnight,

Your handshake cold, your smile a hollow play;

I see now loyalty was just a light

You lit for show, then snuffed when I walked away.

You feast on names until they dare to grow,

Then spit them out once usefulness has died;

I was a tool—too slow, too soft to know,

That friendship’s just the mask your pride supplied.

So take your throne of whispers, smug and thin—

I’ve left your shadow; may it choke you in.

looking for repair

looking for repair (final, 2025)

stood out in the backyard

looking up while looking back

can't say i get it now

can't say i ever did

when you're young 

you're just learning

you swear you know it all

every moment so potent

you trust every fall

once i was a boy

learning to become a man

nothing can prepare you

that life can break your heart

but everybody knows

that all we got is moving on

and here i am

a million miles away from home

images kept breaking

with every step i took

covered it up with anything i could

'til i woke up one day

afraid of what i was

afraid of what it meant to

hide from everyone

behind the beauty of this world

there is so much life to see

wasted time, it's always coming

and then it's time to leave

it takes the lightning to love

takes the rain to cry

takes the sun to burn

and it leaves you with the sky

it leaves you with the sky

that open sky

so i filled it with wonder

filled it too high

dared to look down

froze up inside

we all hurt like hell

trying to find what it's worth

there is a seed in the darkness

beneath the soil of earth

we are all screaming to be heard

we're all dying to be born

and all we ever had are these seconds to know

that there must be love

and there must be hope after all

so i stood out in the backyard

with the cold breeze in my hair

looking for my brokeness

looking for repair

looking for a way back into my soul

i've been locked out for so long 

i can't open the door

if you reach me to love

then teach me to care

if i feel there's calm 

in the storm when you are there

if i can hear your voice

if i can hear it so clear

if it pierces the silence 

of all i've come to fear

here in the back backyard

with the cold breeze in my hair

looking for my brokeness

looking for repair

it takes the lightning to love

takes the rain to cry

takes the sun to burn

and it leaves you with the sky

that open sky

that open sky